The Genuine Gentleman on the Infamous Penis Pants

 Yes!!!! Finally, another way to compensate for a small penis. 

I mean, you have the classic ways to compensate for a small penis:

·       Big Boat

·       Huge Truck

·       Corvette

·       Enormous biceps with a sweet arm band tattoo

and now PENIS PANTS.

 (Designer Isabel Mastache kicked off Madrid Fashion Week with her avant-garde, penis trousers for men.)

Penis Pants? Really, Penis Pants?  I have never thought of myself as a fashion forward gentleman but I have almost always understood the trends until now!  These pants are utterly reDICKulous. 

Imagine yourself at the bar, trying to get a drink and you feel this thing on your hip.  First you don’t mind because the bar is super crowded and you are trying to get your drink on. As you try to ignore it the bar gets more crowded and the thing continues to rub up against you. Seconds become minutes and now you can’t understand what is bumping into you. You look down and see a fabric covered dick on your leg! What the F!  You know what happens next.

Penis Pants? Do we need these? I already assume that every man has one. Just go to the gym and head to the locker room.  You will see plenty of penises just hanging out there but that is what I expect when I change. I just don’t need to be sitting in a meeting and have some banker walk into the room with a cloth dick just hanging there. 

God, can you imagine your dad wearing these! 

Keep checking The.Well.Set for more Genuine Gentleman articles.  The image in your head of your dad in the dick pants will haunt you for the rest of the day. ENJOY! 

Naomi Campbell Shockingly Still a Biatch

 

Photo: Gareth Cattermole/Getty Images, Thomas Concordia /WireImage

After the very sad passing of Alexander McQueen his staff started immediately recalling all of the Spring 2010 samples they'd sent out in preparation for London Fashion Week. His loving staff did this to protect his legacy and insure that none of the pieces were misused for personal gain.

Naomi Campbell, not surprisingly, kept the samples and has been wearing them despite his staff's wishes. I understand that yes, she is Naomi Campbell and yes, that they were, possibly, close friends but this just seems off. Return the dresses Naomi! You aren't fooling anyone this isn't about fashion darling McQueen- it's all about you. Boo on you. 

But, what else would you expect from a person that beats their assistants with cell phones? What a j.e.r.k.