I just threw up in my mouth a little.

Witch
Unimaginative gals

Sexy witch
Unimaginative gals looking to get laid

Dracula
Unimaginative men who hear chicks are into vampires or something

Sexy Dracula
More desperate version of above

Ghost
Unimaginative people of all genders with body image issues

Sexy ghost
Unimaginative people of all genders who are frankly kind of confused about how much skin they should be showing

Pumpkin
Babies with unimaginative and/or lazy parents

Pirate
People who are living in 2005

Ninja
People who are living in 2003

Princess
Girls who cried when the car they got for their Sweet 16 wasn’t expensive enough

Gorilla
Dudes who want to mess stuff up without being recognized

Zombie
People who want an excuse to get totally wasted and bang into stuff

Devil
People who confuse rebellion with evil

Sexy devil
People who confuse promiscuity with evil

Angel
People whose sense of irony is just beginning to develop

Sexy angel
Lapsed Catholics, deeply conflicted Christians

Cat
Girls who make purring sounds at inopportune moments

Banana
The bro whose picture appears in the (slang) dictionary next to the definition of “dealbreaker”

Fairy
Manic pixie dream girl wannabes

Werewolf
Lazy beardos

DYING over this Wes Anderson Save the Date

Of course they are from Austin. Love it.

Something to Consider

"There is no more fashion because there is too much fashion," Pierre Cardin said last night. "There is no longer a separation between one year and the next. We can't make fashion every six months, perhaps fashion manifests itself every ten years, but, in reality, people have to work and the stores have to sell."  [HuffPo/theCut]

Controversial Lebron James Nike Commercial

Closet Clean Out TIME

the Clampetts

I've always been a lover of shopping, but lately it's been really obvious that I don't wear about 80% of my closet. And since I am still in that awkward mid-20s never going to stay in a place over a year phase it seems silly that I keep carting this stuff around. I know what you are thinking: I spent so much money on that! I really loved it! I might wear it someday! 

I just love this picture.

While these are all really valid points they seem a little silly because you know that once you get paid on the first (ahem, ladies) you will head to the mall/outlets/Last Call (my personal fave - they just keep sending my 40% off coupons! it's not my fault & they are online now: trying to hop on the Gilt bandwagon...) and buy yourself a little something nice. Because that's what we do as a culture: we consume and it's ok, just as long as you don't end up like those sad folks on Hoarders who can't keep it in perspective. 

Before

They say your inner state of consciousness is indicated by your outer state, so let's get some closet harmony flowing folks! Here are my closet clean out tips:

1. A good rule of thumbs is if you buy something new you have to give something old away... I don't necessarily agree with this (especially in the world of accessories because those are investment pieces); I do agree with this in terms of more expendable items: jeans, t-shirts, anything that is ripped and or discolored from over wear and can't be salvaged. 

Get rid of wire hangers - they ruin your clothes!
Take them to your dry cleaners and donate them instead.

2. Tim Gunn says that if you haven't worn it in a year then give it to someone who needs it more... I think 1.5 to 2 years is more realistic. Especially in this world of revolving trends (and you know I lurve me some trends) what goes around comes around. Also, this tip is void if you are referring to a formal dress that still fits and you know that you will wear it again coming wedding season (hey, this is the South and the girls got the feva)... As long as it is in good condition and it fits then this is ok by me. 

3. If something doesn't fit, like really doesn't fit: get rid of it... I am guilty of holding onto skinny jeans, etc. And if these items are literally fitting but just a little snug (the key is a little snug) then I will keep them, but if you have to lay down to zip them up, then forgetaboutit. Donate them. Or, in the case of an item that's too big - get it altered. Make sure to price it out first and be sure it's worth it to you.

4. Organize the effort: have boxes/bags marked Goodwill, Trash, Resale, Alterations and Sentimental Value. Go with your gut here - if you agonize for 10 minutes you don't really want it. Worst case scenario put it in your Sentimental Value box and then revisit it in 2 days and see how you feel. 

5. Sell you stuff on Ebay or at Buffalo Exchange/Cupid's Closet... Making dough is good, but Ebay is not so simple. The folks that buy your bargain goods will not always be upstanding citizens and may complain or demand a refund (this happened to me over a $5 pair of shoes. The shipping cost more! I was like lady, they were $5, what did you expect?!). Unless you have nothing better to do than track down their payments and ship items, I wouldn't recommend it. It takes a lot of time. Do the consignment store road instead. You'll get less money but for a lot less hassle.

Figaro is super helpful.

After

6. Organize those accessories! It will make finding the right clutch or scarf so much easier. Donate those kitschy items from Forever21- you only bought them because they were $9.99 anyway.

7. Organize in terms of style and not color...That way if I want a sweater I can choose from that section and get more creative. It's easier for me then by color and it let's me express myself more.

Work shirts, blouses, sweaters, blazers, pants, and vests. 

Summer clothes in the coat closet to de-clutter
your fall/winter look.

As far as updating my look, I've decided to completely embrace the Annie Hall style that I love. That means: skinny jeans, high wasted belted trousers, vests, blazers, cardigans with my own flare. For now I'll be packing away my flowy tops and summer patterned items (That's what my coat closet is for anyways.) for a more sophisticated look that I can take from day to night with a swipe of red lipstick, quick change to heels and some sweet earrings/necklace to top it all off. 

His Knees Look Like Biscuits and He's Ready to Party

What I'm Desperately Wanting Now: Camel Booties

CHLOÉ

Leather ankle boots

$850

 

SCHOLL

Ankle boots

YOOX Collection: Fall-Winter

$128

GIVENCHY

Ankle bootsYOOX Collection: Fall-Winter

$588

The.Well.Set: A Stream of Consciousness or Something More?

Is anyone out there?

It's been brought to my attention by several readers that I tend to misspell stuff, use poor grammar, repeat words, etc. And all I can say is - please tell me! When you read my little mistakes just shoot me an email at afton@thewellset.com. Because as you can imagine, this is not my paying job. This is something I do for fun when my paying job is slow. Or as you can tell lately, my paying job's been really busy, therefore I can't post anything because I'm slammed and am nervous about said errors. Well folks, I don't have time to quadruple checks for errors and most shockingly I try but can't seem to see them - what a bad writer stereotype. Sigh, I am not the world's best writer. 

Oh, Lindsey Lohan.

On a funny side note, one time I wrote my step dad (who I love) this really long emotional letter about how grateful I was to have him in my life, etc. Let's just say it was touching, but my mom later called me to see if I wrote it when I was drunk. No Mom, I was NOT drunk writing! I just get to writing and all hell breaks loose. No grammar, no spelling, no brain. I swear I am above average smart-wise, but don't prioritize these things like I should. Like anyone with a problem: I'll try to do better.

If she can do it, I def can.

Therefore, I am taking a stand for this blog and saying outright that this is not a glossed up web publication (although, I am sure you all thought it was because my severe addiction to amateur hour code writing - also, not my forte) but a working stream of consciousness that gives me a creative outlet. My job is pretty legit but it does nothing for me creatively. So, I took a leap of faith and have put myself out there. It's made me feel pretty vulnerable at times but overall the feedback is solid. 

Hamburger bed anyone?

So, if you'll please keep reading my rantings and ravings, while excusing/emailing me about the errors, I'll keep writing. This bad boy has been up for over a year (1 year last September!) and I am pleased to keep it up. Please keep sending me your fashion questions and I'll keep posting the best jams, stupid videos, recipes, etc. I can find. Thanks for your support.

Lurve,

Aftony Balogna

Gross. Awesome. The Stuff of Nightmares.

Best Snooki Portrayal Yet

JJ's Pick-O-the-Day: I mean, I try to be optimistic... But.

Who.What.Wear Beauty Board: Me-OW

Mischa Barton is one hottttt mess. Jeeze.

Rachel Zoe is Prego! Let me just geek out a little...

Us Weekly reports that Rachel Zoe is pregnant!

“It’s very hush-hush,” a source says of the fashion maven, 39, who is expecting her first child with husband of 12 years Rodger Berman. “She’s telling people she can’t travel,” notes the insider.

Why You Should Vote

Early Voting starts next Monday, Oct. 18th! 

Find your local polling sites here.

Who Needs MTV Anyways? They Don't Even Play Videos.

Pretty Good Jay-em: Deuces

This song is almost good enough to forget about that one time you beat up Rihanna did that unspeakable act of domestic violence. Not. Let's just say I won't be buying this song, but will for sure download it illegally. Say. Say. Bye. Bye.

It's like Judith Leiber for the next generation! Bravo!

P.s. I can kind of see your nips, but great purse!

It's been a long time since I've been into the LV monogram. It's so aggressively recaptured by knockoffs around the world that its almost lost some of its brand value. It's unfortunate because once the House of Louis Vuitton stood for glamour, intrigue, old money and of course world traveling - I can't think about LV without picturing their iconic duffle and even more iconic steamer trunks - but lately it's just stood for outdated and overly consumeristic tendencies of the pre-recession life we all once had.

I must say that I was recaptured by Mr. Jacobs with this LV ball bag. The tassel! The sparkles! The fun and whimsy of what fashion once was... I must admit that the Spring 2011 collection was not one of my favorites. Too gimmicky: too over the top Asian fusion, too much going on, etc. Especially in the wake of some much need minimalism on the runway the show overall just seemed off or at least too ill timed. But Marc Jacobs won me back when he sent this final look down the runway. While I could do without the body painted 'shirt' I cannot live without this purse. It's like Judith Leiber for the next generation! Bravo!

DVF: Best Wrap Dresses and Soon to Be Make Up Label

[theCut] Diane Von Furstenberg will launch a beauty line with ID Beauty this fall, starting with a women's perfume that she and Chantal Roos, the former president of YSL Beauté, have been secretly concocting for the past year and a half. They will later expand to skin care and makeup, which Von Furstenberg promises will be "very advanced" and "technological." Cosmetics aren't totally new to the designer, who had a beauty line and a perfume named Tatiana in the seventies that she sold to Beecham in 1983. No word yet on what the new fragrance will smell like, but it's safe to assume her cosmetics will includehot fuchsia lipstick and something nice to dust onto your decolletage when it's on view next spring.

Midland Rocks

Happy Friday of ACL! I Lurve Liz Lemon.

JJ's Superlative Sunday Picks for ACL: You've Been Schooled

foals (Sun, 1:15p, Honda)

The members of the mathematical rock quintet Foals come from Oxford, England, and have been playing together since 2005. Lead singer and guitarist Yannis Philippakis, guitarist Jimmy Smith and bassist Walter Gervers wear their guitar straps high, allowing them to show off their dexterous riffs across melodies that capture the band’s poppy, frenetic, post-punk sound. 

portugal the man (Sun,  2p, Budweiser)

If for nothing else than their clever name and album titles (i.e., Waiter: “You Vultures!” The Satanic Satanist and The Majestic Majesty), Portugal. The Man would deserve some renown. For better or worse, bandmates John Gourley and Zach Carothers also hail from the same hometown that provides the setting for Sarah Palin’s Alaska. (They now share a house in Portland, Ore.; the home state of members Jason Sechrist and Ryan Neighbors.) But their engaging alterna-pop-rock is the real reason scores of fans are paying attention—and the reason they landed a deal with Atlantic Records, for whom they’re now recording the follow-up to their recent release, American Ghetto. Of all places for a northern-exposed band to record, they chose the dusty West Texas town of El Paso.

and/or

dawes(Sun, 2:20p, Austin Ventures)

Harking back to L.A.’s Laurel Canyon scene—Joni Mitchell, Jackson Browne, Crosby, Stills & Nash—Dawes embraces a rootsy Americana vibe that draws from folk rock’s creative heyday, but adds a contemporary country-rock edge. The quartet of Taylor and his brother Griffin Goldsmith, Wylie Gelber and Alex Casnoff emerged from the ashes of the Goldsmith brothers’ previous, harder-rocking outfit, Simon Dawes. Prolific indie producer Jonathan Wilson (Jenny Lewis, Elvis Costello) helmed this band’s debut album, North Hills, at his cottage studio, where all the songs were recorded live. This touch lends the work an intimate rawness and showcases the band’s crisp harmonies—and an emotional maturity that belies the group’s collective youth. Dawes are hot off a national tour in support of North Hills including a career-making run at South By Southwest.

gayngs (Sun, 3p, ZYNC card)

Gayngs isn’t just a supergroup. It’s more like a super kingdom that’s been inhabited by more than 25 talented indie artists, including Bon Iver’s Justin Vernon and Mike Noyce, P.O.S. and Solid Gold’s Zack Coulter and Adam Hurlburt. The band formed in 2008 in Minneapolis through the efforts of producer/songwriter Ryan Olson, along with Coulter and Hurlburt. They drew their initial inspiration from British art-pop band 10cc’s hit, “I’m Not in Love,” and ultimately caught interest from a plethora of like-minded collaborators. That 10cc sensibility makes its way into Gayng’s May 2010 debut, Relayted, which maintains a soulful-paced tempo at just 69 beats per minute and weaves streaks of R&B, soft rock and a large dose of airy vocal reverb to create modern, tripped-out indie-rock.

yeasayer (Sun, 4p, AMD)

The trio of Yeasayer, comprised of Anand Wilder, Chris Keating and Ira Wolf Tuton, released one of the most anticipated albums of 2010 with Odd Blood, an electronically-infused dance-rock romp through a twisted and exciting musical realm. They first made an impression with their 2007 debut, All Hour Cymbals, winning over audiences with their dreamy hit “2080.” On Odd Blood, single “Ambling Alp” captured the imaginations of listeners with its driving rhythm and anthemic, fist pump-worthy chorus. The New Yorkers have since been touring extensively throughout the states and Europe, moving bodies and caressing ears all along the way. Some of their music seems to tightly embrace ‘80s pop, whereas some strides into deliciously folky territory. No matter what era the guys play with, they always play with gusto, making them a must-see live act for music fans of all ages.

edward sharpe (Sun, 5p, ZYNC card)

For a band known for their peace-and-love hippie aura, Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros have an awfully high body count in the first two segments of SALVO!, the band’s 12-part music video series. The videos thus far feature lead singer Alex Ebert (ex-Ima Robot), as the main character and devil’s offspring Edward, and follows him through his misfortunes in the desert. The band is a rotating collective, with 10 members listed on their Rough Trade Records bio. Rolling Stone declared the group an artist to watch in 2009, calling them a cross between Arcade Fire and the Mamas and the Papas. Their own biography perhaps summarizes their effect best: “Fans are known to be so overcome with emotion at their live shows that tears of euphoric joy are not uncommon.”

the flaming lips (Sun, 6p, AMD)

All Music Guide's description of the group as “acid bubblegum” is as good a label as any to try to explain the dancing-about-architecture nature of Wayne Coyne and bandmates, currently co-founding bassist/keyboardist Michael Ivins, multi-instrumentalist Steven Drozd, who joined in 1993, and drummer/percussionist Kliph Scurlock, a member since 1999. Showman Coyne handles reedy vocals, guitar, keyboards, assorted other instruments and weird theatrics, like floating in a bubble over crowds, filling the stage with animal- or Teletubbie-costumed characters and various forms of provocative behavior. His bent for weirdness extends to bizarre song and album titles like “Psychiatric Explorations of the Fetus with Needles” and “Free Radicals (A Hallucination of the Christmas Skeleton Pleading with a Suicide Bomber).”

the national (Sun, 7p, Honda)

The genre of lyrically driven music has a long and towering tradition; Bob Dylan, Leonard Cohen, Tom Waits and Neil Young pair affecting poetry with moving music to capture the politics, relationships, emotions and movements of the times. The National’s Matt Berninger is keeping this tradition alive brilliantly, crooning or growling where appropriate as brothers Aaron and Bryce Dessner and Bryan and Scott Devendorf set evocative scenes for his voice to wander through. The group formed back in 1999, but their breakthrough came with 2005’s Alligator and its critically-acclaimed follow up in 2007, Boxer.The National just released their fifth studio album, High Violet, in May. Many of the songs on this record have already become favorites for fans at live performances, and the group’s television debut of High Violet’s “Terrible Love” on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon received universal praise. Berninger is a powerful front man, singing with force and truth to swirling, enveloping guitar melodies and sharp, heavy and driving drums to create a devastating musical experience.